Tuesday, October 16, 2007

oops

last night i posted something about my little insanity. i was full of emotions last night, but empty of dulce; nonetheless i updated. i was rereading this last night's post but figured how wrong the words were, how fallacious the sentences were and more importantly, how wrong the post was. i choose not to discuss once again that topic, but name the title, force of habit (?). i know the title sounds vague and people might think, what the hell was so wrong about the topic. don't ask. all i'm saying is how i proved one definite characteristic i have. whenever i am too happy or too sad or doubtful of something, i turn to this blog as my outlet. ditch the grammar or the people reading it. i just want to shout out whatever it is i was feeling. after posting, i soon realize how silly my opinions were and decide the post. this is the second time i did it on blog, a lot of times on my personal notebooks. i can't help but laugh at how horrible my words were and how they don't make any sense. well, i'm not saying that this new post is a better one than last night, it's only a make up for last night's. i am not entirely sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing that i use this blog for this weird purpose. err, might be a good thing since isn't that why blogs were created in the first place? to serve as an outlet? can also be bad considering i write before i think rahter than think before i write. good thing there's always the delete key to save me.


***


i finally had my final grade for botany lab. i got a B+ mehn. it may sound good enough but if you were in my shoes who expected to have an A, you can imagine how bad i felt after i saw my final grade. why the hell would she tell me i am an A, and then take it back? i feel so bitter. i worked hard for botany since it was the only subject where i excelled. and this is what i get? what's worse is that almost half of the block got A's and the lowest ones got B's. mediocracy is never a strength. definitely no chance for DL. one thing i learned, i have to change strategies. if you know what i mean.


***


this early i'm planning my next sem's goals. i just couldn't waste one day of the second semester considering my very depressing performance from this sem.

1. focus on quizzes. be it short 10 item quizzes.
2. don't stay up late, unless it's really important. by important i meant school works and not chatting and stalking.
3. never mind failure. if i fail, i fail. there would always be a next quiz i can make bawi.
4. independence is the key. no more relying on other people to do the job i can do by myself.
5. be mataray. >:)

these are just some of my goals. i have to come up with more specific ones before the sem starts.


***


change is inevitable, but as much as possible, i want change to go my way.

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