After more than two months, I gave up. I thought I was strong enough. I thought I’d keep my promise to stay alive, to stay determined. But I didn’t, I just failed myself. I know I was doing good, keeping up with the stress and all. I kept on telling myself the next week will be better, the next month will be easier, but they never were. It never ends. And tonight, I realized that. No matter how much I think that the long exams and projects will soon be over, those subjects never seem to run out of sadistic tasks for me to accomplish. I’m really really tired. And tonight, I finally gave in; no more masks of determination or perseverance. My emotions overpowered my will.
It’s that heavy feeling again, the one that creeps behind me and slowly pulls me down. It’s like carrying 5 chemistry books in one hand while the other hand’s busy joggling my statistics and psych books, and I’m about to lose control and let all the books fall into the mud.
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I can't wait for the holidays. And by that I meant the ones that do not require me to study for exams or to cram a multimedia presentation.
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