these things

In today’s NSTP processing session, a groupmate shared a story on how different the phrase “to live” meant for animals and for humans. He said when animals “say” to live, they pertain to breathing, eating, and sleeping. But when humans speak of to live, we talk of things other than our basic needs. We talk about the things that make us alive. These are the things that help us live, things that keep us alive, things that give life to us. And what are these things? To realize the things that help us to live is a purely subjective and personal notion. What makes me alive may probably be different from what makes another individual alive. Nonetheless, I contemplated real hard on the things that give me a rush, on the things that ask me to live.

To give back
As part of our processing session, we were asked on how we consider NSTP. Courtesy bias aside, I said it was a channel of helping me realize that there exists two different worlds and that one of the two worlds is not as privileged as the other. Belonging in the more blessed group, I have the opportunity to realize this and later on do something about it, to make a difference. NSTP gives us the chance to try remolding the triangle we all live in because we can convert this triangle into a square where in two different worlds no longer exist. Spending my Saturday mornings in Montalban is a way for me to try and give back whatever I have been receiving to those kids. And to realize that I am actually accomplishing this goal of giving back gives me that fuzzy feeling that I am actually helping.

To remember
When I say remember, I like to point out on the littlest things, those details that most people usually forget. Like the last time someone sent you a hug emoticon? Or the number of times your crush said your name? Or maybe the color of his or her shirt when he or she met you? These are things we tend to forget since they don’t seem to be very important when in fact, for me, these may be the details that really matter. ‘Cause it’s when we remember these tiny bits that we recall how important a particular moment was since a big important picture starts with small seemingly unimportant pictures right? Getting my drift? I’m thinking that if we can remember even the tiniest detail of things, it just proves how important that particular something may be.

To feel your heart jumping
Every morning I pray that I hope to have a reason for my heart to jump or for my heartbeat to stop even for a millisecond. When does this actually happen? Mmm, when I get excited for something? When I get surprises? When something unexpected comes my way? When I hear a good story or a good joke? Usually those things, no matter how small, which seem to make my day a little better. It’s good to know that sometimes, things find their way into me and just make me feel a lot better when I needed something to pick me up.

To love and learn
HAHAHA. This is getting really cheesy, but oh well let’s continue. They say you don’t look for love, it finds you. Now this reminds me of the sacrament of waiting; we wait for love to happen because something can only be considered true love if it can wait. However, in case love fails, our only fallback is that we’ve learned. We learn the things we’re supposed to do and the things we’re not supposed to say or do next time. And besides, love is not always a romantic entity. Love is when you remember to say good morning to your parents. Love is when you listen to your friend’s problems. Love is when you take the initiative to share your umbrella. Love is when you give random hugs to people, hoping they’d appreciate the gesture.

To accept failure
Failure is like pain, you wouldn’t know it’s important unless you feel it. And knowing that it is important helps you realize that it is something you actually need in your life, something that makes you live. And I know to realize is hard enough for anyone to take in, what more in accepting it. Wouldn’t it be worse if we were to live a life without mistakes? We wouldn’t know if what we are doing is right or wrong since we’d be thinking we are right all the time, and we all know that’s not always right. It’s a matter of balance of successes and failures; whatever we fail to achieve equals to us gaining more than we have lost.

When humans live, they do so not only to survive but also to realize that we live not only for ourselves.

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Oops, I didn’t foresee I’d be writing a long one tonight. Maybe I just missed writing about the cheesy things instead of ranting about school-related stress.