the rain has come. the pre-opening of classes frenzy has started. people have started to 'pile up' at our store. i have bought neew notebooks and bags and clothes and shoes. my summer's over.
i found myself shocked to find out that next week, i'll be moving to quezon city. in a week, i will be opening a new chapter of my life, a very big and crucial one. and i haven't started packing my bags yet.
last night, while i was rummaging around my closet, i couldn't help but get scared by the fact that i'll be wearing casual clothes for four years, and might end up with nothing to wear. it's like i don't have enough clothes. but it's not really the clothes that bother me, i'm more scared of the new phase i'm entering really soon. i'm not used to going to school walking for about 10 minutes to get there, or nor with wearing casual clothes, or waking up early just to use the bathroom earlier than my 7 other apartment-mates, or going to school without having a hearty breakfast, or being around really smart people (i heard from a friend that bs psych people are the brainy bunch, last year's no. 1 was from this course), and i think i don't have an edge against them. i mean, what could i possibly have that they don't? moreover, being with my [sibs] scares the living daylight out of me! new school. new class. new friends. everything has to be new. it took me four years to figure out who my real friends were, i can't do it all over again?
adjusting is one thing, but living in it is another issue. yes, probably i can adjust to this new life since i really don't have any choice, but choosing to live this life i'm entering is something that doesn't take me just a few days. i have to live a different lifestyle, and by that i meant stepping out my comfort zone. there wouldn't be a mom or a dad who could buy me anything anytime. i have to really use my allowance wisely. there also wouldn't be any ate beth who prepares my rice meal breakfast. i have to choose between manang's canteen or pandesal from pan de manila or a grumbling stomach. breakfast at fast food chains are too sinful. and breakfast food like conred beef and luncheon meat might as well be considered dinner for me. als,o no more starbucks since a frappucino is equivalent to a day's meal already. so to me, adjusting + tightening one's belt = living it. as i picture it now, it seems so difficult on how i could possibly survive, but then again, if my brother has managed, why can't i? all it takes i some roughing it and a whole lot of canned goods, instant noodles, pandesal and a bunch of self-assurance.
so it's so long sweet summer, and hello nerve-wracking college.
*i'm currently wasting my time on this game called weffriddles. it's actually quite addicting. after three days, im still stuck at level 17. try it and get addicted too. ;p*
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